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It's always been me...

This has been a long time coming. I've been struggling for what feels like years to dial in communicating in a way that felt authentic, in real time and devoid of the pressures and expectations to constantly be reaching out with something/anything (whether it was in alignment with me or not) lest you forget about me or worse hit the dreaded unsubscribe/unfollow button. So welcome. You can expect realness with GROWTH NOTES. I'll be sharing stories from my life about things that are growing me in real time and how I'm working with them. I'll also be sharing experiences from my past that I've integrated and share lessons from being on the other side. GROWTH NOTES will also be a space where I do direct teaching on important concepts as they relate to emotional growth, emotional embodiment, creating/sustaining emotionally mature dynamics with others and most importantly finding inner peace and wholeness. I'm so glad you're here Brenda. I'm glad you're here because I'm launching into GROWTH NOTES today with some changes and sad news about my life. News that I'm not ready to share on public platforms yet so you're the first to know. Last month my partner of 6 years ended our relationship and we are now in a slow process of conscious uncoupling. Sigh. I seriously fucking hated typing that. Reason #1 for why I hated typing that is an obvious reason one. There's grief and pain. We didn't split in a dramatic or toxic way. There is an immense amount of love between us. If anything, our relating to each other was probably at the most emotionally healthiest we've ever been due to the amount of work we did together over the years. What I am starting to understand the more I move through my grief is that while the partnership had more health and safety, as individuals we still had unmet needs and we struggled for a while to support each other in getting these needs met. This an undeniable truth (we love each other but aren't getting our deepest needs met) can be hard to accept when you're so bonded with someone. Reason #2 why I really hate sharing this break up with you is that sharing, being current and honest about what's happening is poking at this secret fear of mine... that I have completely lost credibility now. The belief is: "Being in a relationship gives me credibility as a dating/relationship coach." Thankfully, I've been smashing this limiting belief over the last couple weeks. Here's what I realized yesterday when I updated my website to reflect not being in my partnership anymore. This thing has always been me. As I read through the "My Story" section of my website (which had a picture of us and some paragraphs about how we entered and still are in partnership) I saw that it was really simple (not easy) to edit that to reflect the uncoupling AND to continue my story... I wrote... "Today, my sense of self is intact. I feel whole. My purpose and direction in life are still clear to me. I'm equipped with tools to embody and integrate all the grief, all the lessons and all the joy of this life-changing partnership as well as any other curveballs life throws my way. This is what it means to be an embodied woman." Commitment to integration, commitment to becoming an embodied woman has always been the thing here at Women Can Heal and I can finally see it. It wasn't just about helping you find a partnership or improve the dynamics in your current one. It's about deep healing and inner work and embodiment for fulfillment in all areas of your life. That's the heart of everything I've ever done. It's been the thread that's been running through my life, my coaching, my content on social media...everything and I'm opening up to see that my reliance on partnership as credibility clouded my ability to see that. This thing has always been me... In or out of a partnership. There will be much more to share Brenda as I continue to evolve here... but for now I think I'll leave it there. Thanks for receiving this and me. Feel free to respond, say hi or share anything this GROWTH NOTE brought up for you. I'd love to hear from you.


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